Samples
Memoir
I live in the “City of Peace.” In 1946, Geneva, Switzerland, was selected as the site for the European headquarters of the United Nations. Geneva is home of the Red Cross, established in 1863, and in the decades since, many of the largest international diplomatic organizations, including the World Trade and World Health Organizations, are now established in Geneva.
For me, it’s difficult to think of Geneva as a “peaceful” place, given the emotional trauma I experienced there, not in the lovely city at large, but in my exquisite home. The irony is⎯ how do you say it? ⎯dramatic. In any case, the city of Geneva is postcard beautiful, and millions of tourists come every year to experience its over-the-top luxury and medieval charm.
Geneva is famous as a center for producing the finest watches and luxury jewelry. Rolex is headquartered here, as are many other exclusive watch brands like Patek Philippe, Vacherin Constantin and Chopard. Do you like chocolate? Geneva is where the master chocolatiers weave sugar and cocoa into delicious chocolate delicacies. The biggest physics laboratory in the world, CERN (European Organization for Nuclear Research), is where the “God Particle” was discovered. In the spring, the Geneva International Motor Show is the “go to” auto show for the world’s automakers, attracting more than 700,000 visitors annually.
In Geneva, you will find centuries old landmarks, many of which date back to the Middle Ages. It is surrounded by the majestic, snow-capped Alps that are reflected in the placid waters of Lac Leman, known as Lake Geneva to English speakers¾one of the largest lakes in Western Europe. Popular sights include the Jet d’eau, a fountain that shoots a stream of water 460 feet into the air above the lake. St. Peter’s cathedral was built in the 12th century and its stone towers are a prominent feature of the city skyline. Old Town is full of romantic charm with cobble stone streets, flower box windows, fine wine and gourmet restaurants. Geneva's culture is heavily influenced by its French neighbors just across the border, and its vineyard-rich countryside ranks among Switzerland’s most romantic getaway places.
Our family lived in Chambésy, one of the many neighborhoods where the fabulously wealthy maintained huge residences. Roughly fifty percent of the residents were foreign nationals, like my husband, Frederick. He earned millions every year as a UN diplomat and high-ranking executive in the oil and gas industry, which is why we could afford to build such a magnificent home. It is sandwiched between the Danish and Chinese embassies. If our neighbors ever heard or witnessed any disturbances at our place, they kept it to themselves.
June 28, 2012 started like any other day. It was the beginning of summer, where average daily temperatures are in the high nineties. I liked walking my long-haired chihuahua, Remi, around our neighborhood in the mornings when the air is cool and lightly scented by the rows of flowering Linden trees. We strolled past the other enormous, gated estates whose homes were hidden from public view by hedges that are too tall to peek over (though I have stolen a few glances while their gates were open). It is necessary that such properties take the highest security precautions and build high walls around the perimeter and only a single entry¾the gate.
I decided to take my favorite route that day. To our left was the Danish Ambassador’s residence, and on the right was the Chinese Ambassador’s residence. They often hosted receptions, and when they did, black limousines parked all along the street, with chauffers patiently waiting, and majordomos with their white gloves waiting to greet the guests.
Down the road on the left is Villa Greta, a property transformed to a museum and cultural meeting place. They organize concerts and contemporary expositions and are known to provide cheap housing for art students. Further ahead on the left was Château Malvand, originally constructed in the early 1600s by a noble family from Valencia who were connected with the Spanish Catholic Monarch. They named it “La Tour,” because the original structure featured a large tower. The classic chateau, maintained by a foundation, has gone through many changes through the centuries.
Behind a big brown gate was the Thailand Ambassador’s residence. Further along was the Angola Ambassador’s residence. Remi liked to stop outside their gate and bark, calling out to his friend, a white westie, to come out and play.
Remi and I often took a route that afforded us the best views of Lac Leman and the Alps. I smiled and waved at people we passed along the way, never sure whether I had just waved at a grand duchess, a cat burglar or the Ambassador of Denmark.
Returning home from our walk, I used my remote control to open the tall iron gates protecting our property. Cleverly concealed video cameras were posted inside and out. I had originally thought this level of security was designed to keep our family safe, which is partly true. The main motive, though, was to enable Frederick to keep me under constant surveillance. As the gate swung open, I waved at the camera that pointed to the road outside the gate and flashed my most brilliant smile. It meant, I see you, too, scoundrel. It was a message to Frederick, who habitually watched the day’s footage later while the kids and I ate dinner, leaning back in his camel brown leather chair, eyes fixated on the monitor.
Self Help
Try as you might, you cannot avoid pain and suffering in your life. Suffering has been hard-wired into the human psyche, and everyone suffers at one time or another. But why should suffering exist? Can we rid the world of suffering?
Believe it or not, pain and suffering serve an important purpose. We wouldn’t be who we are, or who we will become, without it. “Life wasn’t meant to be easy” is a phrase that’s been uttered by leaders and poets throughout written history. Especially when we’re young, we want to believe that the treasure at the end of the rainbow is happiness, and we spend years in pursuit of it. It’s lovely to believe that lasting happiness is not only possible but is our life’s purpose. The self-help industry makes millions perpetuating this belief. The truth is, though, that lasting happiness is unattainable. Most religions teach that what is most important is not human happiness but developing our relationship with God. God loves us and does the best for us, even if it is painful, because he has a plan for us all.
The longer we live, the more we begin to recognize that suffering is part of life’s design. We give up the wishful thinking that suffering is unnecessary and that there is no reason that a loving god would morally justify it. Whatever you believe or how much you want to resist, suffering exists, is common to everyone, and has a purpose.
Most of us can look back at our lives and remember times when suffering has benefitted us and made things better. We’ve learned things we could only have learned from experience. That which hasn’t killed us has made us stronger, as Friedrich Nietzsche so wisely observed. Because of our pain and suffering, we developed some of our best qualities. Many scientists, inventors, researchers, and great leaders were molded from suffering.
One negative effect of suffering is the desire to suppress emotional pain and relieve the discomfort of it. The easiest way to make it go away is to ingest some kind of substance that provides temporary relief --- drugs, alcohol, chocolate cake, cigarettes, French fries -- none of which actually help and actually make things worse. In any case, none of these “numbing” tactics deal with the cause of the pain, which then finds a way to emerge somewhere else in your system. Taking medication is admitting that, “the solution is outside of me,” which is the victim mentality. Another problem is that drug use is taken by the body as a clue to stop manufacturing the natural chemicals produced by the brain.
Physical pain is different than emotional pain. Physical pain is an indicator that something is wrong with our bodies, and in that context, pain is useful. In contrast, emotional pain comes from the energy introduced into the body by the old, heavy thoughts and feelings from past traumas and memories we store in our cells, and the unbeneficial lifestyle we choose. Emotional pain keeps us in a weakened condition because it shuts down the optimal flow of energy.
Emotional pain is your resistance to all the negative emotions you feel and accepting who you really are. Resisting it only serves to attract the opposite of what you want. Pain works against you when you are not conscious and aware of its presence and what it is trying to tell you. Once you develop your conscious mind to see that pain has a purpose you can turn things around and use the pain to work for you, and not against you. When you are totally receptive, you’ll be able to use your pain as a strong motivator and fuel for action.
People with large egos suffer the most. They live in anger and self-pity, which can lead to addiction. Many will hit a wall, or “hit bottom,” and from that dark place, somehow the spirit emerges, and they become the great, wise beings all of us are meant to be. It was their suffering beyond endurance that gave them the will to push through. They have finally discovered the cause of all their misery−−themselves. They realize that they were the creators of their own misery. It is a striking revelation.
Business / Corporate Culture
One of the great lessons I learned when I wrote and published my first book was the importance of having just the right title.
With that in mind, I must confess that I had a great deal of trepidation about giving a corporate book a title that included the word “spiritual.” Almost all the corporate consultants I talked to about writing this book advised me to stay away from using such words, even in the main body of the book, let alone in the title!
And yet, I am sure you will agree that, while the word “spiritual” implies being not of this world, the term “spiritual intelligence” has an altogether more worldly and practical ring to it, following logically as it does from the other two accepted forms of intelligence¾intellectual and emotional.
Both intellectual and emotional intelligence are now part of the normal vocabulary of both the science and the practice of modern management, so it is surely not pushing the envelope too far to suggest that there might be come benefit in looking more closely at this other down-to-earth attribute that all human beings possess¾spiritual intelligence¾and seeing how it might be used to good advantage.
In 1997, I wrote and published the book, “Radical Forgiveness: Making Room for the Miracle,” that proposed a form of forgiveness which was totally different from the traditional version of forgiveness that most people understood then to be the only kind. Radical forgiveness turned out to be, in stark contrast to traditional forgiveness, easy to do, simple to effect and almost instantaneous in its result. I have been doing workshops around the world using this particular technology since then, and it has changed the lives of many thousands of people.
Radical Forgiveness was so successful because it did not rely on, or even reference, the traditional psychological therapeutic approach to forgiveness. Neither did it identify with the other-worldly spiritual approach to forgiveness with its meditations, guided visualizations and other “special techniques that don’t work. No, it was amazingly successful despite its apparent simplicity because it called upon and utilized the person’s innate spiritual intelligence.
I say innate, because I believe that it is something we all have¾and in roughly equal proportions. It’s just that we have tended to ignore spiritual intelligence and have downplayed its importance in favor of intellectual intelligence. Not that it is in competition with intellectual or even emotional intelligence. All three are complementary.
Having proved that Radical Forgiveness works, I am now using a similar version of the technology as a form of conflict resolution and prevention within organizations. This version not only has the same case and simplicity to it, but the same dramatically high level of success. It is called the Quantum Energy Management System (QEMS). The book you ow have in your hands sets out the rationale for this system.
Business / How-To
Publicity, practiced properly, is an art. And, like art, everyone may not have the talent for it, or an understanding of it, or even a liking of it, but everyone who’s in business needs it. With this book, I hope to ignite your passion.
Art is a creative endeavor. We learn the fundamentals from skilled instructors, then take those teachings and mold them until they become our own, unique expression of our “professional being” in the world.
At any given time, there are millions of people who resonate with you and want what you offer. What keeps them at a distance is that they don’t know you exist¾yet. The trick is to get word to them somehow, effectively, efficiently and exponentially, without spending every last dime in your pocket. That’s what publicity is for. Be assured: The audience you need is out there, affordably. Your public awaits.
This book is written by someone who believes that publicity is one of the best things you can do for your business if you want to achieve sustainable success. Whether you use publicity on its own as your key outreach strategy, or whether your publicity works in concert with the numerous other marketing options at your disposal, getting your name out there with help from the media and other influencers attracts tons of attention from the marketplace that far exceeds that of your less enlightened competitors.
I’m going to teach you how to get publicity by showing you how to position yourself or your business in the media spotlight and how to leverage the resulting attention to reach the audiences without whom you cannot succeed.
You’re going to learn how to enroll the media to help you spread your name and message far and wide to the target audiences who don’t yet know about you or how fabulous you are. If you already use publicity in your business, this book will hone your skills and reveal opportunities you didn’t know existed. If you don’t know how or why to use publicity, fasten your seatbelts. I will pull back the proverbial curtain so that you can step in and partake in the feast.
It’s a universal truth that everything in this world is possible with the help of other people. All of us are connected. People put you in touch with life-changing opportunities, and they also spread the word. Never underestimate the human social network and how its attitudes and behaviors affect the decision-making process. Word-of-mouth is the number one reason why people decide to do business with you.
Remember that shampoo commercial from the 1980s? “I told two friends about Faberge Organics shampoo, and they told two friends, and they told two friends, and so on, and so on…” Word spreads like a virus, its cells multiplying and growing until that fateful, wonderful day when someone you meet at a party says, “Hey! I’ve heard good things about you! Let’s dance!”
Media coverage provides the best environment for word-of-mouth transmission. Thus, journalists are the people who have the skills and audiences to help you achieve your vision for yourself and your business by making you, if not semi-famous, then at least worth getting to know. People do business with people they know, like and trust. When you’re able to successfully earn the respect of information gatekeepers and messengers, you open up the floodgates and warm leads rush in. If this torrent of success is what you want, read on.
There are thousands of books on the market about how to get publicity for your business. It makes sense; most public relations people are good writers who are skilled in the art of promotion. What’s different about this book is that it’s a deeper dive into working with journalists than I’ve seen in most of the “how to do PR” books out there. Your ability to understand the media mindset and what makes a good story are mission critical. What’s wonderful is that it’s easier than you think, as long as you work it.
There are many moving parts to a successful publicity program. You’ll need to create pertinent content that is captivating to the media and their audiences. With time and research, you’ll assemble a database of media contacts who need your content. You’ll know the kinds of stories they’re looking for, and you’ll keep your relationship with them alive by being a reliable resource of quality information, even if you don’t personally benefit from sharing your expertise.
You’ll need to become crystal clear about the value of “personal brand.” It takes a close examination of your strengths, passion and knowledge as an individual or as an organization. The more finely honed your brand is, the stronger your opinions and commitment to providing service to the world, and the more confident you are about your unique distinctiveness, the more the media will want to work with you. I can’t wait for the day when you step into your brand, watch it soar past the tipping point and go viral. It’s a high. (Warning: May become addicting.)
Fiction
This was the first time Amelia had ever been eager to leave Sedona. This particular Sunday in April, after the morning sun had slowly illuminated the crimson canyon walls towering like sentinels over their secluded resort cabin, Amelia was already tossing her overnight bag and hiking gear into the back of the Jeep.
This romantic weekend with Danny, their first out-of-town getaway as a couple, had been disappointing for Amelia. Her displeasure was mostly with herself. She was falling into her pattern of finding fault with a man she felt close to. She couldn’t help herself. The urge was automatic, like a preset alarm clock that goes off at the same time every day and can’t be stopped, no matter how many buttons you push, and she’d lost the manual. She was conscious of it, thanks to years with a good therapist, but helpless against the onset. It was a survival mechanism, established in childhood. If you love them, you must leave them, before they can leave you.
The judging began at dinner on Friday night. In the candle lit, nouvelle cuisine restaurant overlooking Oak Creek, Danny hadn’t put his napkin on his lap, had ordered dinner for himself without first asking Amelia what she wanted, and then hovered protectively over his medaillon de boeuf au poivre vert like an inmate in a prison cafeteria, talking with his mouth full. For the piece de resistance, he’d ignored the check for so long Amelia felt obliged to pick it up. Amelia had seen him eat before. She knew the subject of “table manners” had never been raised during his upbringing. It had never bothered her before. There were too many other wonderful things about Danny to keep this from becoming an issue. Yet tonight, his table manners, or lack thereof, became “strike one.”
Their hiking excursion on Saturday was a long series of annoyances. While she leapt deftly from rock to rock over the burbling creek beds and maneuvered silently like an Indian scout through the underbrush, he crashed along several yards behind, cursing under his breath and pausing occasionally to squash another cigarette butt into the pristine, soft-soiled nature trail—strikes two, three and four.
The coup de grace, strike five, was when Danny shoved Max, Amelia's massive Chesapeake Bay retriever, after the huge dog shook the creek water from his thick red fur like a washing machine’s spin cycle. Amelia laughed uproariously. Danny scowled. “He did it on purpose!” Danny said, wiping the wet from his arms as if it were offal.
Saturday night's lovemaking had been tender and satisfying, but afterwards, while Danny dozed, Amelia wondered if it was time to deliver her usual breakup speech, the one she gave to most guys six months into the relationship. She had hoped it would be different with Danny. He was good-looking, strong and lean, with sand-colored hair and hazel eyes rimmed by dark lashes. He was also funny, skilled as a carpenter, eager to please and of all things, attracted to her. But the urge to reject him was compulsive. Too bad. Time to run. Another one bites the dust.
Danny drove Amelia's SUV east on the desert highway leading away from spectacular Sedona, and southeast towards Phoenix. Amelia twisted around in the passenger seat to take a long, last look. The ribbon of blacktop behind them receded into a shrinking wall of purple and red rock skyscrapers, wavy in the desert heat and indomitable against a cloudless, blue sky.
“You know what's the hardest part about Sedona?” asked Amelia.
“The red rocks?” Danny answered.
“No.”
“The lack of good cell phone reception?”
“No! Driving away from Sedona is the hardest part about Sedona.” Amelia twisted back around to watch the road ahead. Leaving Sedona was like waking from a dream, she thought, as the lush canyons, creeks and cottonwood trees flashed past. Facing them now was the stark reality of desert: brown rock, brown scrub, brown dust, blazing sun, blast furnace heat.
“Yeah, you got that right,” said Danny. “The hardest part is leaving.” He worked a toothpick in his upper teeth as he drove.
Danny’s mind and self confidence had left Sedona hours ago, though he was careful not to show it. What had he done wrong? He'd done everything Amelia had asked, gone everywhere she'd wanted to go, climbed the hot, jagged rocks, made her laugh, pleased her in bed, respected her “alone time,” let her pick up the check at dinner (she had often insisted in the past and seemed pouty when he’d refused) and tolerated the dog, which he mostly liked until it shook its wet fur on him. The dog had done it on purpose, he was certain of it. After splashing in the creek, the big bear of a creature sought Danny out before unleashing his furry flood. Amelia had laughed her deep, earthy, sexy laugh, but otherwise, Danny could tell she was tense, was pulling herself away. He hoped not. She was The One. Only an hour and a half left to go, then he’d give her some space and she’d warm up to him again. For one thing, he’d take her to Marie Elaine’s at the Phoenician and pay the check even if she objected.
Amelia sighed, rested back against her seat and looked out the window. She wished there was a more scenic route back to Phoenix, but there wasn't. As far as the eye could see, there was flat, seemingly lifeless land littered by varieties of unfriendly cactus and the occasional, twisted scrub oak. On the far horizon was a range of low, dome-shaped mountains, and past these, the Valley of the Sun and home.
Danny's cell phone rang: It played “Barracuda” by Heart. Amelia winced. Strike six.